Going Back
by ALC Punk
Summary: What if Kate Pryde-Rasputin had gone back instead of Piotr in the Age of Apocalypse?


_**Disclaimer/Explanation: You know the drill, I don't own them, though I wish I did. My college education would cost SO much less.. Oo.. Wash U. Or, UMC... *ahem* Anyway, I'm NOT making any money off of them.**_

This is set in the AoA, for those that wish to know... I've always liked What If?s.. And I was being good--I could have done several things and I didn't... (looks at the notes on how the uni would have fractured because C made it to the crystal...)

Major dipsmoochage to Acetal for beta-ing, and making me *laugh*... 

PG13 (at least) for language. 

# Going Back

## by Ana Lyssie Cotton

_"You can not save me! I can't even save myself!!" --Stabbing Westward_

"That's madness!"

"Yeah, fine. Whatever. I'm going," Kat turned and dived over the balcony, letting her own weight pull her down. Because if she stopped, if she let him talk her out of it, something inside her would die alongside her students. Alongside her kids.

As she fell, she heard Illyana ask a question and Piotr's answer, "Don't worry Little Snowflake, she'll be back."

The air whistled around her as she fell, faster and faster, the ground suddenly looming. She phased, stopping the fall and solidifying enough to walk across the ground, towards the entrance. _Two guards,_ her brain catalogued, as her body began moving through the motions, lashing out, catching one in the knee, the other in his jaw. Claws out, slash, slash. Both down, both dead. Down the entryway, through a tunnel, then the door.

It was closing, she ran harder and slipped through it into chaos. People fought, men, women, children. Pulling, biting, ripping, tearing. In the middle, a blood-soaked, blonde head flashed. "Die, you bastards!"

There was blood everywhere, red and slippery. Kat ignored it and waded in, smashing someone here, kicking something there. More piled in, smashing brutal fists into her partially phased self. She felt something crunch in her chest and ignored it, desperate to reach Paige. Nearly there. Something grabbed her by the hair and pulled. She phased completely and whirled, phasing back in as her claws sliced through his throat. He died.

Turning back, she found a girl trying to bite her as a woman clung to her left arm, pulling her downwards. Her right fist--claws still extended--slammed into the woman's jaw, nearly taking her head off. The little girl shrieked as she was kicked, and disappeared.

A flash of blonde hair again and she lunged forward, grabbing Paige's shoulder. Phasing the both of them, she airwalked upwards.

"Ma'am, what about the others--Jono, Ange, Vinny--Mondo?" Paige could barely be understood around what appeared to be a broken jaw. 

"I--" A blast went off to their left, underneath, "Good gods. Jono!" She air-ran, leaned down and snagged the British boy's hand. He whirled in mid-air and nearly blew them away. There was something wild, insane in his eyes. "Jono! Don't be stupid, boy. It's your teacher," Kat snapped at him.

He blinked, his eyes blanked and then suddenly they were alive again--bleak, but alive. Kat didn't wait, just made sure she had a good grip on both and began to air-walk upwards. 

"Wait! What about Ange?" Paige demanded, grabbing her arm. 

Kat ignored her and continued upwards until a convenient ledge appeared. She stepped onto it, unphasing them all, "OK. You two stay here. I'm going after Espinoza."

"You can't." Jono grabbed her arm. "He's dead."

"You don't know that for certain!"

"Yes, I do." He released her and staggered over to lean against the wall. "He...He fell...They, they pulled him apart as I watched--bit by bit." His voice cracked. "Oh, gods, his screams--he didn't stop. Not until...Not until I blasted him--all of them," he finished in a whisper.

Paige reached out and hugged him. "It's not your fault." He shivered in her arms, almost trying to get out of them. Kat watched, trying not to feel. Knowing that she couldn't do anything to lessen the pain.

"We nearly died in here. Can we leave?" Kat gestured, "We need to get back to the surface, get on with this."

The two looked at her, Paige sighed, winced as her jaw twinged and nodded carefully. 

"Yeah. Fine, let's blow this joint," Jono carefully stepped up to Kat and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Paige did the same on the other side and Kat phased them, walking upwards.

"Kat?" Paige shifted slightly. "I think..."

"I'd like to blow this joint in the strictest sense of the word," Jono interrupted.

"You mean phase down to the reactors and blow them?" Kat felt frozen, suspended in time. "Do we know where they are?"

"No," Jono shrugged, wincing as muscles pulled. "I'd like to try."

"No. We can't risk it," Kat sighed. "As much as I want to do to it them..."

"I...I think we should leave. Worry about it later," Paige voted softly.

Nodding, Kat continued air-walking them out. 

* * *

None of them had spoken more than a few words, routine checks for life and injuries. Getting to the mansion, and once there scanning the situation also occupied them. But now? Now they were waiting. And it was time to talk. Kat thought it really could have waited, but Piotr wanted to, so she shrugged and walked off with him.

She didn't have long to wait.

"Katya, that was very foolish of you," Piotr admonished. They were standing outside the shell of the mansion that had until recently been the X-Men's main base.

Somewhere in the tunnels below them were Dazzler and Paris, attempting to find Gambit and the boy. Kat pulled out a cigarette and lit up. "That's nice, dear."

"What if you hadn't made it back, Katya? Where would Illyana and I be? What if we'd needed you?"

"Frankly, my dear husband, I don't give a fuck." She dragged on the fag again and blew a cloud of smoke into his face before turning away to stare into the distance.

It was at this point that Rogue came towards them, obviously worried about her son, but just as obviously disturbed by their bickering. "You two all right? I know--you lost some of your students. I-I'm sorry about that."

Kat puffed on the cigarette and stared out across the torn and jumbled lawn.

"It happens. My sister got out safe," Piotr replied into the silence.

Nearly choking for a moment, Kat turned to stare at him, then shrugged. "We need to finish this. Excuse me." She nodded to Rogue, and ignoring her husband's outstretched hand she wandered over to the makeshift medibay.

Paige watched her teacher approach and suddenly felt sad. Here she was, sitting next to the man--boy? Man--that she loved and her teacher was miserable. Jono was sleeping at the moment, most of his injuries having been superficial. They'd been lucky that way. She shivered. They nearly hadn't been. _A few minutes more, and we'd've been dead. I wonder if she knows that?_ A thought crossed through her brain and she blinked. _And then there's her husband. Would HE have come after us? Our other 'wonderful' teacher._ She rather thought he wouldn't have. _Ever since we found out his sister was alive his only thought has been for her. We were merely a means to an end._

Her teacher was walking oh-so-carefully. _Fragile, as if she would break..._ And her other teacher was following her.

"Katya, I--"

But Kat had finally reached the end of her patience. She whirled to glare at Piotr, fag in hand. "That's right, it's always been about you. From the beginning, I had to love you because it made you safe. I married you because that was the only way to 'protect' me--you said. I accepted the job of training the next generation of mutants--even enjoyed it--because it raised your position in Magneto's eyes. And then we found your sister again, and suddenly SHE'S the new priority for you. Your comfort again takes precedence. Well, it's NOT about you anymore. It's finally about me and what *I* want." 

She paused, waiting for something that never came. Piotr stood there stiff, silent. Kat nodded and drew on her cigarette, "I want my children back. I want them to grow up, live in a world that they can be proud of. I want Vincente and Angelo and Mondo and all those children from the Core alive. But most of all," her voice cracked. "I want to stop seeing the look in Paige's eyes as we deserted them, every time I close my eyes." She dropped the butt and stamped it into the ground while lighting another.

Piotr shifted, his voice flat as he finally responded, "You wish a divorce?"

"A divorce?" Almost hysterical sounding, she backed away. "I want never to have known you."

* * *

The battle raged around them, Paige fought next to Jono, desperately trying to keep the soldiers and mutates from attacking the crystal. _Our last, best, hope. Dammit, it better have been worth it._ They were swarming them, trying to stop Illyana and the man called Bishop from changing the past. _Apocalypse will win. We HAVE to stop them._ She slammed a morphed fist into one of them, sending it to the floor. Another tried to cut her legs out from under her, she jumped into the air and came back down in time to see Jono fry it.

"Thanks."

"Don't--" He turned and fried another one, "mention it."

They fought on, trying to ignore what was going on further up. Somewhere, Rogue was fighting for her child and Magneto fought Apocalypse. 

Kat suddenly appeared on her right, "We're winning!"

"Oh, good." Paige shafted another soldier. "What about the--"

A terrible scream rang out from the crystal. "ILLYANA!!!!!!!" Colossus screamed, and threw himself towards the crystal.

"Piotr! No, you--" Kat threw herself between her husband and the crystal. 

Paige screamed and tried desperately to get there in time. _She won't phase. I know she won't! And he's NOT going to stop, oh GOD!_

*SHRAKT* Colossus made a horrible sighing/screeching sound and collapsed in a heap mere inches from his wife. Paige turned. "Jono?"

"He wasn't going to stop."

"I--he." Kat blinked, her eyes stinging as she looked at them.

"We did it!" Illyana came dancing out of the crystal, happy. "Mr. Bishop is gone...Piotr?" The child stopped and stared at the fallen frame of her brother. "No...NO!"

"Illyana--" Paige started towards her.

"Get away! Go AWAY! PIOTR!!!" The child dropped to her knees and began keening. 

Paige stopped, feeling saddened. She turned to Jono, "I--" Something flashed overhead, and Magneto and Rogue landed near them.

"It is done?" Magneto looked exhausted, his wife held their child.

"Yes, sir," Kat said softly.

"Father! They have--I can't believe they actually!" Pietro came to a stop in front of them, panting, his face ashen. "They have sent their nuclear weapons upon us."

"The human resistance?" Magneto asked, dread turning him into an old man.

"Yes," his son answered, eyes bleak.

"There they are," Rogue whispered softly, staring up at the silent cilanders as they fell.

"I'm sorry." Kat looked at Paige and Jono, her heart hurting. "I guess I saved you only to stand with you as you die." She reached out.

"It's not your fault, ma'am," Paige said softly, taking one of Kat's hands. Jono silently took the other.

Kat stepped forward and gently wrapped her arms around them. "I--"

Everything went white.

_-Finis-_

* * *

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© 1999 Ana Cotton. 

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